Week 11 (2021)
global parenting & single mothers, telling stories, community agriculture & communal recipes
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to read: essays, articles
There’s a Better Way to Parent: Less Yelling, Less Praise — Joe Pinsker, The Atlantic — “There’s a lot of good scientific evidence that children have an innate instinct to cooperate and work together with their families. And child-centered activities can kind of strip away what I call their family “membership card,” the feeling that they’re a part of the family and working together as a team—not a VIP that the parents are serving. Kids want to help us and be part of our lives, and we can take that away with constant child-centered activities.”
Single Mothers’ Attitudes About Work and Motherhood — Amber Lapp, American Compass — “I can say from personal experience that middle and upper class stay-at-home moms are deluged with messages about self-care and how being a mom is the hardest job in the world. The message that poor moms hear is different: you’re lazy unless you get a job—er, make that two jobs.”
The Psychological Comforts of Storytelling — Cody C. Delistraty, The Atlantic — “A narrative works off of both data and emotions, which is significantly more effective in engaging a listener than data alone. In fact, Jennifer Aaker, a professor of marketing at the Stanford Graduate School of Business, says that people remember information when it is weaved into narratives ‘up to 22 times more than facts alone.’”
Will the CSA Boom Survive Beyond the Pandemic? — Bridget Shirvell, Civil Eats — “‘Interest in CSAs is not going to fade away any time soon, for a number of reasons,’ said Tropp. Beyond the pandemic, she expects that continued work-from-home flexibility, and a continued desire for people to buy food directly will keep CSA programs on people’s radar.”
Inherited Flavours — Gracy Olmstead, Comment — “Recipes tell a history, then— not just of one’s own family members, their daily habits and meals, but also of their larger community. Through Grandma Mom’s recipes, I have documentation of many of the women in her church and town. I have a written record of their names, their favourite ingredients, their relative skill with stove and oven. Grandma Mom’s recipe cards do not just preserve her own past. They help us glimpse an entire place, and all the people who populated it.”
(Maybe I’m a broken when record promoting favorite writers, but don’t miss out on Gracy’s thoughtful monthly newsletter, Granola. It discusses place, books, and community. She also wrote a book, Uprooted… coming out this week! "
to read: books
The Most Precious of Cargoes, Jean-Claude Grumberg — audio — Thank you Casey Haas for sharing the recommendation! Such a heartfelt little story.
Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat: Mastering the Elements of Good Cooking, Samin Nosrat — audio — So fascinating and fun! I need to enjoy more books on the art and science of cooking. (If you have favorite cookbooks for specific ethnic cuisines, too, I’m in the market for a couple.)
to watch
Building a Culture of Solidarity that Works for Mothers and Children — I’m also a broken record for Leah Libresco Sargeant’s work (like her Substack). She cheers on women and their work so well.
to listen: music
The Lumineers — The Lumineers — This house has heard more audiobooks than music lately, but this week we brought it back to sophomore year of college in a very basic way.
to listen: audio
Being More Human with Amber Haines — Perennials Podcast — I found her writing only after reading two of her husband (Seth)’s books. They both have refreshingly unique and personal angles when crafting their words.
to cook
German Potato Salad (for Jakob’s Weber-kettle ribs!)
to celebrate
My spunky, tiny, German great-aunt (in her 90’s) is recovering from Covid and influenza. I’m in awe and thankful.
At almost 4 weeks old, Lukas’ due date was this weekend. And Ezra turned 15 months old.
Gracy Olmstead’s book, Uprooted, comes out this week:
“I've written a book about my Idaho homeland—a book about family, rootedness, homesickness, and exodus. It's a book borne out of love for the rural West, & out of a growing sense of urgency over issues of conservation & stewardship.”
to remember, reflect
A Year Ago...
We flew to Kansas City for the wedding of Missouri friends. Jakob was a best man in the Pie Day wedding. Being with friends we moved away from a few months prior was life-giving. We brought 3 month-old Ezra and heard about closures and shut-downs throughout the trip. Coming back to Long Island to a quickly changing world was surreal, and in hindsight it’s amazing the wedding was even able to happen.
This Week...
My parents are in town, reporting for grandparent duties. There will be more walks to take and meals to prepare together. There might even be a date night or afternoon. It’s a welcome break from the newness and rigor of caring for two kids under a year and a half! A break in one sense, but more of a sharing of the joy, I suppose.
Ezra has been loving his pom hat from his aunt Erin this winter. She sent some cute bonnets this week I’m excited to try on the boys. (Find some goods over at her online shop.)
“Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God.”
Colossians 3:12-16